Boobs are not that sexual - Mojisola Omoyemisi

Take your eyes off the boobs for a minute and read.

The society we live in doesn't frown against public breastfeeding. But a woman whose boobs stay out even half of what you see up here... is seen as a slut.

I bet i would be harassed if I wore a dress that showed this much boobs on a normal day. But two days ago... when I was out, watermelon started to cry and refused his bottle outrightly. One woman came up to me and asked me where the mother was.

I told her am the mother. She gave me the deepest frown of disapproval I have ever seen in my life and asked me what the hell I was putting on a tight fitting cloth for.

"Come here" she said. She pulled me and turned me around forcefully. With one sweep, she pulled down my zipper and asked me to breastfeed him right away if I didn't want her to pounce on me. I turned around to face the wall... But I brought out my boob totally. As I breastfed a now happy melon, I wondered whether she would be nice to me if I had my boobs out without a baby.

I'm not sure what stand to take. Pro public breastfeeding or against. But I do know that this society is fucked up. Come to think of it... boobs are not that sexual. The primary purpose of boobs is breastfeeding. So why do we make them into such sexual items?

Just why?

The Innoson/GTB Saga: Why Nigerians Are The Easiest People To Rule by Bayo Adeyinka

I used to think Nigeria was a very difficult country to govern. Now, I think I know better. This country is one of the easiest to rule over. Once you understand the psychology of the average Nigerian, it's easy to have a field day. This current Innoson versus GTB saga exposes the mind of the average Nigerian.

The average Nigerian has the concepts of right and wrong blurred. Right is only right when their personal rights are breached. At other times, it doesn't matter. The average Nigerian loves to get involved in fights that don't concern them. Especially when big men are involved. In Nigeria, we have little men fighting in different corners for big men. In saner climes, big men fight for their little men. We either fight for Atiku or we are throwing punches on behalf of Buhari. We shout in support of Wike or demonstrate in support of Amaechi. Meanwhile, big men never fight big men- they employ smaller men. Our leaders understand our make up perfectly. The average Nigerian loves drama. So they make sure, it is one week, one drama. Just last week, it was the hijab episode. Give a Nigerian good soap opera and he forgets his misery.

An average Nigerian doesn't really care about corruption. What he is worried about is that the crumbs are not coming his way fast enough. The Nigerian politician understands that perfectly. So they throw packs of Lipton tea and Gala at us. Some are magnanimous and they increase the crumbs to packs of Indomie 'Hungry Man' size. Others will allow the citizens enjoy free train rides. The average Nigerian loves freebies. They really don't care that there is really no freebie anywhere. It is Abu's money that is being used to give Abu a treat but Abu doesn't even care to understand. The average Nigerian doesn't have any ideology. That's why he finds it easy to explain away anything- including how politicians jump ship.

And here's the big two- tribal affiliations and religion. Our leaders understand that if you want to muddle up a case, introduce the twin evils of tribal affiliations and religion. Our colonial masters understood this strategy and used it to their advantage. Have we really considered critically what they termed 'indirect rule'? The strategy of 'indirect rule' continues till this day. While the characters have changed, the modus operandi remain the same. Even the most upright are caught in those traps at times. Here, some make very sweeping hasty generalizations- Yorubas are betrayers. Yorubas hate Igbos. Igbos are fraudsters. Hausas are the problems of Nigeria. We forget that we are all victims held together unwittingly and unwillingly in this contraption called Nigeria.

And here's where I'm going: the Innoson versus GTB case has now become a tribal issue. What was a mere business matter between two business partners has become a national trouble. Our leaders understand that we joke too much and we are never a serious minded people. Maybe that's why the comedy industry is booming even in recession. We make jokes about everything. Is it not a joke when some are encouraging others to close their GTB accounts even when they barely understand the issues on ground? Nigerians lack capacity for deep introspection, truly. So if there's a run on GTB because it is a Yoruba bank that wants to kill an Igbo business, what will happen to branches of GTB all over the South East? What will happen to the branch managers (who are most likely Igbos), the Relationship Officers, the tellers, the security men and several hundreds employed by the Bank? If you really don't care, what about those who supply products and services to GTB branches in the South East such as diesel, their kitchens and restaurants, stationeries, local artisans like electricians, carpenters and painters who are called to attend to one issue or the other? Is it not an irony of sorts that it is this same set of people who are rushing to close their accounts? A case of the real victim not knowing he's the victim- a flea attacking a dog in order to kill it but not knowing it will die before the dog! I saw a poster where an individual said he asked his two billionaire brothers to move their funds. Well, one thing he forgot is that most likely these billionaire friends of his might also be indebted to the bank. All big men use debt to expand their businesses- it's not a crime. The bigger you are, the bigger your debt usually- especially once you have demonstrated capacity. But if they want to move, they need to pay down first. It's not quite easy, you know.

The Innoson versus GTB saga should never have been a social media war. E no concern us. It's a purely business relationship gone sour between two business partners. People are too emotional rather than logical. Most of those rushing to close accounts can't even apply for a loan of N1m not to talk of N1b or more like Inmoson was given. So why are they losing sleep over matter wey no concern them? How many of them can afford to buy the least of Innoson's vehicle? Both of them will bury the hatchet and shake hands very soon. And you, O little men, will not be there. When big men shake hands, little men are never invited. Meanwhile, if Innoson has been accused of committing a financial crime, does helping the economy as a home-grown industrialist invalidate the act?

Anyway, our big men understand we don't have staying power. In a week, the music would have changed as another movie debuts.

Please I'm looking for fuel. Who has 25 liters to borrow me?

How People Make Their Rulers Monsters and Other lessons by Otunba Adeniyi Adebayo

When Otunba Niyi Adebayo won the election to be the Governor of Ekiti State, in 1999, not many people gave him a chance of making any meaningful impact because he was considered a greenhorn. What people, however, did not know was that the young man watching his father, late General Robert Adeyinka Adebayo, former Military Governor of the old Western Region of Nigeria, had gained a lot of insights even without being an active participant.

Niyi, a lawyer by profession, shares notes on his life in the Government House in Ekiti, and lessons for other professionals who want to venture into politics. Enjoy the reading.

Lesson 1: Politics is not dirty.

People use statements like ‘politics is a dirty game’ to drive good people away from politics. For me, what I have come to discover is that the more good people go into politics, the cleaner it will become. If you have clean people going into politics, they will clean up the system. Interestingly people who are insider want to prevent other people from coming in because they don’t want competition, they tell you it is a dirty game, don’t come. No, it is not. That is what I found out. What is politics about? It is about the people who will be in charge of the country. If you don’t have good people in charge of the country, you do not have a good country. So, the cleaner the people that come in, the better it would be for the country. My advice to professionals, Christians, Muslims, and religious people is that the more good people we have in politics, the better for our country. Once you have something good to offer, give it a shot. You never can know what impact you can make.

Lesson 2: You need to create your own identity

For me, going into politics was not to make money; it was about making a name. When you are the child of a successful man, you are always in his shadow. I wanted to come out from under that shadow and make my own name, so that people would not refer to me as General Adebayo’s son, but rather as Niyi Adebayo. I believe I was able to achieve that because my going into politics was not self-serving. It was about service to my people and I saw it as stepping stone to greater things. I do not believe my political life has ended yet. I believe there is still more on the horizon for me politically which I am working towards.

Lesson 3: People turn their rulers into monsters.

One lesson I learnt while in government is that it is people that make governors or presidents to misbehave when they get into office. It is the people that you are governing that turn you into a monster. As a governor, people believe that their whole lives are dependent on you. That is, if they get into your right hand, they can become billionaires tomorrow, even without doing anything. To a large extent, that is true. It will only take one contract and you are made. Consequently, people do not tell their rulers the truth because they want to be in their good books. They elevate them to a god-like status. Even when you are doing foolish things, they will tell you ‘brilliant’, and because everybody is praising you, after a while you too will begin to believe that you are doing the right thing and you begin to question your judgment. And as you keep imbibing their praise-singing, you may lose control of yourself. So, to be a good governor or administrator and not lose control, this is where a good wife comes in handy because when you are losing control, she will tell you things as they are -frankly. But if you don’t have that kind of wife, you will lose control and start to believe everything they tell you even when you know they are not accurate. You start fighting real critics that are criticising you for the good of all. The sycophants will be telling you ‘what do they know, don’t mind them, they are only seeking attention.’ You know as you keep listening to them after a while, you begin to believe the sycophants and everybody that disagrees with you becomes an enemy. I experienced this first hand. It was my wife who helped me to keep my focus.

So, you need a good wife and good old friends, preferably those you grew up together with. Make sure you give them access to you because they will tell you the truth because they know where you are coming from.

I had my father’s experience to teach me. I saw my father as a governor. I saw him after office; I saw how people were with him when he was the governor, I saw how fewer people were with him afterwards. I was able to come to terms with the fact that this thing is temporary; it is not forever. Another luck I had was that I grew up in Lagos; I lived in Lagos. I went to be the governor in Ekiti. When I ended up being governor I came back to Lagos and what I did whenever I was in Lagos as governor, and I want to go out to the polo club or any other such places to relax. I would drive myself; I would take along a security man in mufti. He would wait for me in the car; I would move normal like before. So, I tried as much as possible to be my normal self.

Lesson 4: Give access to as many people as you can

As the governor then, I saw that you could be imprisoned and shut away from good people. But if worked against that by ensuring that as many people that needed to see me had access to me. I would read any letter somebody wrote to me. If it is something I should pass to someone else, I would minute on it. If I needed to reply, I would reply. I was doing that because that was the only way I could get a feel of what was going on in the state. You knew how people were feeling about you. That way, I knew what was happening in the state. Sometimes even before I get security report from the security agencies, I already knew what happened because somebody had already written and told me about it.   I got very useful information this way including an experience where I learnt that my associates were using my name to collect money from those who wanted to get Cof O. I was able to address that by information by an ordinary person who I allowed to see me on a Sunday.

Lesson 5: You need a good home to achieve your dreams.

First of all, I would say that I have been blessed by God because I married a very wonderful woman. My wife is a very wonderful, brilliant and very supportive woman. At a time when I was a struggling lawyer, she was in employment. She had a salary, but I didn’t have. Well, I started with a salary but after working for two years, I set up my own practice. So for quite a while it was a bit of a struggle. But she was there very supportive; she had her salary. If she had not been supportive at the time, life would have been difficult. As a politician, you need a supportive wife. If your wife is harassing you at home, you won’t concentrate in the office. As a matter of fact, as a governor, if your wife is not supportive, you just wouldn’t have the mental wherewithal to perform your duties as a governor.

I must say the women in my life have been supportive because to a large extent I was brought up by my mother.

Lesson 5: God is number one.

I am a practising Anglican; I try as much as possible to go to church every Sunday. I say my prayers every morning before I leave my house. I try to

my duty to God because He has been very good to me and my family. I will continue to praise and glorify his name.

Lesson 6: Friendship is important.

Making and keeping friends has been an important aspect of my journey. I don’t have problems making friends. I have lots of friends. I always tell people that you will not encounter a problem with your friends if you know who they are. So, I always try to know and understand what people are, so that we don’t have problems. If I know you to behave in a certain way and you behave that way to me, it doesn’t create a problem for me because that is what I expect. You hardly ever hear that OtunbaAdebayo and somebody are fighting. Friendship is important to me. I am faithful to my friends and my friends are faithful to me.

Lesson 7: Fun time

I like to have fun. I like to hang out with my friends, sit down have drinks, gist, play. Now and then I go to parties. It is important to enjoy the day as it comes and as you are allowed by God to experience it.

Best advice

One thing my father used to say to all his children while we were growing up was to remember your name. It is not only for you; it is for everybody. If you spoil it, it affects everybody not only you. So, whatever you do in this life, make sure you have a good name. I hold unto that and I have passed it unto my children.

Books

I enjoy reading history. I can’t think of any book that was written on Nigerian Civil War that I have not read. I like biographies. I love reading John F. Kennedy. The other one that has impacted on me greatly was the biography of Abraham Lincoln.

Regret

I started the medical school for the University in Ado-Ekiti. When we collected money from the bond, there was a certain amount of money I was supposed to

release to them for the takeoff of the college. Unfortunately, because of administrative lapses I wasn’t able to release that money to them before I left office: that is regret. Other people have tried to take credit for starting the College of Medicine, but I refuse to accept that. I started it; I appointed the first provost; but unfortunately, we were not able to release funds to them for the takeoff before we left office. To a large extent, I have that regret.

100 days of President Muhammadu Buhari abroad: Nigerians didn't vote for a fragile picture-posing foreign-based mannequin to be a President - Fani Kayode

President Muhammadu Buhari has been away from our shores for over 100 days in a stretch treating an undisclosed and mysterious illness in far-away London.

Since May 29th 2015 when he was sworn into office as President he has spent 350 of his over 740 days in power abroad treating the same strange ailment.

Those that demand that he should “resume or resign” are being attacked and brutalised by security forces and agents of the state.

The Buhari government is a murderous contraption that has no respect for human rights and civil liberties.

Charly Boy Oputa, Deji Adeyanju, Ariyo Dare- Atoye, Jude Ndukwe and other notable figures and leaders of the “Our Mumu Don Do” movement were brutalised and almost murdered by Buhari’s savage footsoldiers at Wuse Market in Abuja the other day simply because they dared to go on a demonstration and ask for the President to “resume or resign”.


If that had happened Nigeria would have exploded yet no arrests have been made and the government seems unperturbed.

Tension has gripped the land as we approach October 1st and the Nigerian people have expressed deep concern about what is unfolding yet all we are fed with on a daily basis are pictures of an ailing Buhari, posing like a fading and ageing Playboy model, holding court in London and granting audience to his friends, political associates, family members and loyalists.

The whole thing is not only inappropiate and undignified but it is also deeply insulting. Simply put it is sordid. The Nigerian people never banked on or voted for a fragile picture-posing foreign-based mannequin to be their President.

Meanwhile the world laughs us to scorn and mocks our nation as one in which even a walking corpse that is clearly suffering from dementia can lead and hold sway.

We are a nation in which an Acting President who is scared of his own shadow, who appears to have lost touch with his senses and who has forgotten the history and heritage of the people that he supposedly represents, has been reduced to a mere national co-ordinator and that is in the power of a faceless and tiny cabal of neo-nazi racists, religious bigots and power-hungry geriatrics.

The truth is that we are now a full-fledged dictatorship that is being controlled and presided over by a tiny cabal with a religious and ethnic agenda.

This, together with an unrelenting, though unsuccessful attempt, to demonise and crush the traditional opposition and silence all forms of dissent has resulted in the irresistable rise of powerful and well-organised secessionist and separatist groups such as the Yoruba Liberation Command (YOLICOM) and the Nnamdi Kanu-led Indigenous People of Biafra (IPOB).

The fact that the Federal Government is incapable of encouraging national cohesion and integration but is instead saddled with a morbid obsession to try to destroy President Goodluck Jonathan and rubbish his excellent legacy speaks volumes.

The lies and propaganda of the Buhari administration are second to none. Simply put they are filled with deceit, deception, mendacity and hate.

They have sought to demonise and destroy more innocent Nigerians than any other Government in our entire history.

They have killed more innocent Nigerians than any other Government in our history outside of the civil war.

They have locked up more innocent Nigerians and subjected them to shameful and barbaric witchunts and media trials than any other civilian Government in the history of our country.

Under them murderous soldiers slaughtered over 1000 Shia Muslims in one afternoon in Zaria and buried them in mass graves.

Under them thousands of IPOB youths have been butchered by security agents.


Under them hundreds of thousands of innocent Nigerians have been raped, maimed, robbed and massacred by well-armed, well-funded and well-organised Fulani militias and herdsmen all over the country yet not one of the perpetrators has been arrested or brought to justice simply because they are members of the President’s ethnic group and they are his loyal footsoldiers.

Under them Boko Haram has resurrected, restored its fortunes and won back virtually all the territory that they had lost when President Goodluck Jonathan was in power.

Under them more Christians have been butchered and more Churches burnt down than any other Govermment in the history of Nigeria.

Under them northern youths have given a chilling quit notice to our Igbo compatriots to leave the north. They have also threatened them with genocide and mass murder if they fail to do so by Octobr 1st yet not one of those murderous youths has been aprrehended, questioned or arrested.

Under them a frightful and barbaric song has been crafted and is being shared and sang all over the north which openly calls for the ethnic cleansing and total elimination and annihilation of every Igbo in the country yet the song has not been outlawed or banned and its authors have not been arrested.

Under them a culture of silence and fear has been imposed on the Nigerian people and few are ready to risk life, limb and liberty by speaking truth to power or resisting and standing up to tyranny.

Under them the worst economic recession that we have ever experienced in our history has been established and the Nigerian people have been afflicted with pain, hunger, hardship, suffering, poverty, uncertainty and despair.

Under them cows (yes cows!) have taken over our city streets, schools and places of worship and the lives of cattle are deemed to have more value than that of human beings.

There is no gain saying that Buhari and his followers are not only a curse and a terrible affliction on our nation but they are also a very real danger to our unity as a people.

Their objective appears to be to turn Nigeria into a nation of quislings and vassals and a colony of pliant and cowardly slaves.

They refer to every northern Muslim that resists their evil agenda and that does not support them as a traitor and an infidel and they refer to every southerner and Christian as a slave and an unbeliever.

Their’s is the language of hate, violence and division and it must be condemned and resisted by all men and women of goodwill regardless of their faith and ethnicity.

More than any other Government in our entire history the Buhari administration has divided us along ethnic, religious and regional lines and they don’t appear to give a hoot about the implications of doing so.

As a matter of fact the contrary is the case: they appear to enjoy doing it and they feed on the dangerous divisions that they have created.


As regards Buhari himself, I have said it before and I will say it again: he is the darkness that seeks the darkness and the most divisive and destructive leader that Nigeria has ever known. He is the quintessential biblical Amalekite and the classical “troubler of Israel”.

The Bible says “the tender mercies of the wicked are cruel” and Buhari is cruel indeeed. As a matter of fact he is not human and he is incapable of exhibiting any form of genuine compassion or kindness.

He is a demonic incarnate. He is what the great writer and historian David Icke describes as “a shape-shifting reptilian” with sociopathic and psychopathic tendencies.

Cold-blooded and ruthless, he thrives in the shadows and he is led and guided by the dark spiritual forces and entities that brought him into this world to do havoc.

And like all reptilians, to maintain his human form he drinks human blood and eats human flesh.

Simply put he is a wicked and unrelenting sadist whose failures as President are glaring and manifest for all to see.

Worse of all, he hates the children of God and despises the forces of light. Malevolence is his forte and destruction is his delight.

He thrives on both and he feeds on the energy, essence, glory and souls of his innocent victims.

May the Ancient of Days deliver our country from his evil clutches and may the Lord of Hosts save us from those that regard and worship him as a living and cultic deity.

Permit me to conclude this contribution with the following.

So obsessed, so primitive, so provincial, so evil, so insensitive, so petty, so cruel, so crude, so paranoid, so deluded, so out of touch with reality, so reckless, so hateful and so obsessed with President Jonathan and the PDP is the Buhari Presidency that they went as far as to say that the great lady and former Minister of Information Mrs. Dora Akunyili was sent to her premature death and early grave because she was given a job by the former President.

Never in the history of our nation has such a vicious, nonsensical, baseless, malevolent and specious mendacity been pronounced by an official of the Federal Government.

One wonders whether Buhari and his minions have any shame? One wonders whether they have any respect for the dead?

One wonders whether they are not all suffering from dementia like Buhari is himself?

One wonders if they have any decency or humanity left in the deeper recesses of their antedeluvian and pyschotic souls?

Nevermind the fact that the statement was issued by a very junior staff of the Presidency who I gather is as much of a palm-wine guzzling low-life and woman of easy virtue as she is an ugly old drunkard: the truth is that she looks and reasons like a blood-swirling ritualist and the product of an incestuos union. Imagine having to come home to that every night?

Yet whatever she is, whatever she drinks, whatever she smokes, whoever her parents are, whichever poor soul she goes home to every night and however repugnant her looks may be the fact remains that what she has said is morally reprehensible.

It is also a clear reflection of the callousness, the grave psychological degeneration and the deep intellectual bankruptcy of the Buhari administration.

Whatever Buhari and his minions may feel about Jonathan, the People’s Democratic Party or anyone else they should please leave Dora Akunyili out of it because this profoundly good lady that brought joy to the hearts of so many is not here to speak for or defend herself.

They should allow this great daughter of Nigeria who was not only my colleague in the Obasanjo administration over ten years ago but who also served our nation honorably and creditably through the auspices of no less than three PDP President’s and Federal Governments to continue to rest in peace.

Buhari and his staff talking about Dora is like the the devil talking about an angel. They are not fit to mention her name or to lick the bottom of her shoes.